so after a very VERY long time, i am blogging. i hope you all had a great summer. we had a great one. swimming and fishing in the keys. visits. fun in the sun, for sure. mine was also full of important thoughts. thoughts that would change the world. thoughts such as “should i dye my hair darker?” (yes). and “are seven uniform shirts too many for one five-year old boy?” (no). setting the world on fire, i am.

but i have a thought that has been swirling in my head literally all summer, so i am finally blogging about it. i am finally setting to paper (or internet in this case) what has been in the crock pot of my brain.

have you ever been talking and suddenly someone you love becomes the subject? so you are sitting there absorbing all the thoughts about this beloved soul and the odd thing about it is that it doesn’t seem like the person you know. an example. my sister (happy birthday, sister!) has a great husband, but she says that whenever people speak about him she feels like they are talking about someone she doesn’t know. not that they are saying BAD things…they just aren’t assigning TRUE good things to him. or worse, and not in the case of my sister, the people start assigning bad things to the person you love that you know just aren’t true. it’s just a strange feeling to wonder whether these people know the person you adore better than you! sometimes, there are just so many people talking. could it be? all of a sudden you wonder if your beloved friend is having an entirely second life with an alternate personality in which you are simply not included.

so where are you going with this random diatribe, you ask? i’m getting to it. don’t worry.

so swirling around this summer have been a number of issues in which christian people have been very outspoken. gay marriage. the whole hobby lobby thing. and although i consider myself “christian” in that i strive to be christ-like, when i hear a lot of christian spokespersons speaking, they don’t seem to be speaking about the jesus that i know.

here is the jesus that i know. the jesus that i know dispensed grace and mercy. he defined himself by love. he actually said he IS love. he gave up EVERYTHING so that we could know God and be forgiven. he wanted to show people the way to joy. he wanted to give out grace to everyone, even to those who were completely undeserving (which is everyone), so that they could know his Father the way he did. that is the guy i know.

the guy i know didn’t want power. he didn’t want to LEGALIZE the things he believed were truth. he didn’t want for people to know he was right. he didn’t want to protect what was his and make sure no one else got it. he certainly wasn’t endorsing particular businesses.

i am certainly not saying that God has no standards. i am not saying he doesn’t love chicken nuggets or craft supplies. clearly not. the Bible is very clear that he has a standard of holiness. i am just saying that whole point of all this is that NONE OF US COULD EVER MEET IT. ever. in any way. with any amount of effort. so he sent Jesus. to distribute amazing grace to completely undeserving people. and to continue to distribute it as we muddle through the rest of our lives.

so, what i can’t understand is how this guy who is totally defined by love and giving and grace and mercy has gotten on all the banners of people who are trying to LEGALIZE, DEFEND, EXCLUDE. clearly, the most ridiculous example of this is the westboro folks. (i think i spelled that wrong, but i don’t want to give them the privilege of having me google it! even though now if someone googles it, they might get this blog. but only if they spell it wrong. back to the point.) i mean i don’t think that ANY REASONABLE PERSON has any doubt that they have no idea who Jesus is. but they think so. they think that the guy they are working for is the same one that i read about saving a woman about to be stoned for fornicating. i just don’t get it. i don’t know how they lost sight of the kid i know.

and maybe i’m wrong. i am definitely NOT a theologian. i am just a silly girl who has a hard time keeping on the point. maybe Jesus would be trying to win supreme court battles and protesting and all of that. but i just don’t see it. instead, he went person to person changing people’s hearts by distributing undeserved mercy. he sat next to a woman at a well who was outside his race and had five husbands so that he could show her how her life could be better. so that’s what i am going to do. or try to do. because i don’t want people to think that false things are true about someone i love. i am just going to assume that i am right about who Jesus is. in the same way that i know that my sister is right about her husband. and i am going to try to do small things that show people the real him that i know. the one who had love for everyone. who gave out mercy for no reason at all. who knew that there was enough grace for all of us.  hopefully, through the small acts of grace, love and mercy that i am able to accomplish, people will have a slightly clearer picture of who he is.

i know there are already tons of people doing the same. working every day to make sure that people know the merciful, grace-filled jesus through their example. most of you are probably already at work doing small things just like that. maybe you people just have a harder time getting on tv. you should really work on that.  

quick note: IF YOU DO NOT KNOW JESUS, look for him. read what he said. not what people say ABOUT him, but what he actually SAID. read about what he did. not what people claiming to be fans did (look no further than the inquisition for why that is a bad idea), but what HE ACTUALLY DID. and see what you think. i bet you are surprised. and then make a decision about HIM. not other people. as i said to vin, my beloved, years ago, you don’t have to like redskins fans in order to like the redskins. find the real guy. and THEN decide what you think about him! i promise…he’s a goodie!

i love you guys!